So many times we find ourselves desperate for something. There will always be that desire for something more. For instance, now, for me, it is marriage. I desire to find someone to settle down with and create a nice little white-picket fence life with-but reality is, that if I recieved this desire there would soon be another to follow, perhaps kids would be next, or buying a house. It doesn't end.
The conclusion I have come to is that we must be desiring something greater than, there must be an ultimate in the desires and when we acheive it we acheive contentment. I know what it is too. It is no secret and it is nothing to hide. In fact, I want to shout it from the rooftops.
Heaven. We desire communion with our Father and time with the most high. We desire a physical hug from the one who loves us more than any other. We are not desiring a boyfriend or a house or a kitten or a Happy Meal from McDonalds, we are desiring heaven--something bigger than ourselves. For the time being we will love the next cute guys, keep checking Criag's list until that 100,000 dollar dream house comes on the market and chew on our french fries... But in the end we will find ourselves content in His embrace.
Wednesday, May 30, 2007
Tuesday, April 10, 2007
Delight
I don't often think about God's love for me and the vastness of it. I think that is because, I know I can't fathom it-but the repercussions of that way of thinking is that I don't feel enough of God's love. I think I know God' love with my head, but it is just hard for me to feel the warmth of a loving embrace from God.
But lately, I have been thinking-this thinking all sparked by a conversation with my friend Christina. She told a story about her love for showering and about how recently she found herself with a broken shower. Her water pressure was reduced to a mere trickle for days on end, and for someone who loves showering that is miserable. She got to her wits end one day and grabbed the shower-head and prayed-God, PLEASE fix my shower! She goes about her shower and then hears, 'cough'-'cough'... and the pressure was back. No lie.
Now, you might think it silly-that God would answer such an insignificant prayer. There is so much hurt and pain in the world and prayers are being tossed into the abyss often and much. But the lesson in all of this, is that God truly desires to do little things for us. When he is able to do something small, like peak sunshine in thru a 3 day long cloud cover for use; something that brings a smile to our face and a warmness to our hearts. This is when He is glad. He is warmed by our simple delights; these delights cause us to delight in Him and that is what life is about.
So pray often and about anything your heart desires. Pray with a hope and an assurance that the prayer you give to God will be answered. Know that God wants us to delight in Him and is happy to give us small desires as we dream them up. Embrace those gifts. Know that we serve a God who desperately loves us, so much so that he would do anything from fixing a shower head to sending His Son to earth. What a delightful thing to meditate on.
But lately, I have been thinking-this thinking all sparked by a conversation with my friend Christina. She told a story about her love for showering and about how recently she found herself with a broken shower. Her water pressure was reduced to a mere trickle for days on end, and for someone who loves showering that is miserable. She got to her wits end one day and grabbed the shower-head and prayed-God, PLEASE fix my shower! She goes about her shower and then hears, 'cough'-'cough'... and the pressure was back. No lie.
Now, you might think it silly-that God would answer such an insignificant prayer. There is so much hurt and pain in the world and prayers are being tossed into the abyss often and much. But the lesson in all of this, is that God truly desires to do little things for us. When he is able to do something small, like peak sunshine in thru a 3 day long cloud cover for use; something that brings a smile to our face and a warmness to our hearts. This is when He is glad. He is warmed by our simple delights; these delights cause us to delight in Him and that is what life is about.
So pray often and about anything your heart desires. Pray with a hope and an assurance that the prayer you give to God will be answered. Know that God wants us to delight in Him and is happy to give us small desires as we dream them up. Embrace those gifts. Know that we serve a God who desperately loves us, so much so that he would do anything from fixing a shower head to sending His Son to earth. What a delightful thing to meditate on.
Monday, April 2, 2007
Baseball=spring
Day Two. And I feel like I do not have much to report. I find myself caught up in the busy-ness of the day, not taking the time to think "surprise me, God". I am sad that it wasn't more obvious as lived out my day to day--but only disappointed in myself for not taking life at a slower pace and breathing in each new moment and each opportunity. But it is only day 2 and I get some slack in this life-style change... right?
The day was laced with fun encounters with friends. I was able to meet a friend for lunch where conversation was lively and fun. Then on to a grieving friends house to bear cookies where we could watch an exciting game of baseball out their window.
The baseball game really made me ponder hard on the fact that spring is so close. Though the weather did not match the sight (it was a little bitter out today)-though the sun shown through a light layer of low clouds and the boys with their purple uniforms showed the excitement of a new season. Baseball is such an emblematic way to welcome in the Spring season: Outside games, fans eating popcorn and drinking cola, and tan lines.
Baseball is not only a symbol of spring for me, but it is also near and dear to my heart because it has always been a family past time of our. You could say, in fact that we are the All-American family: with our red, white and blue decorated house, 2.5 kids (really only 2-thank goodness: point 5 would be weird) and a dog. My dad is a huge baseball fan, partial to the '61 Yankees-and I hesitate to say (ducking for the on-coming tomato storm) even a current Yankees fan. We made it a priority to see as many baseball fields as possible in our 13 moves and millions of cross country trips. I believe I even have pictures of me under 1 year old in a white bonnet cheering on some obscure baseball team-it is in my blood. So not only was the on-coming of spring a gift today in the form of a leather bound white ball with red laces... but it was also a reminder of family and all that together really brought me joy.
Amongst the hustle and bustle of a truly busy day; later in the quite reflection of a day not yet lost; I am living in that moment, sitting with 2 dear friends watching spring ushered in thru the strength of the bat against a ball, and the memories of family; appreciating the simplicity of life and happy to live in it.
Go Twins! (and maybe even-Go Yankees!)
The day was laced with fun encounters with friends. I was able to meet a friend for lunch where conversation was lively and fun. Then on to a grieving friends house to bear cookies where we could watch an exciting game of baseball out their window.
The baseball game really made me ponder hard on the fact that spring is so close. Though the weather did not match the sight (it was a little bitter out today)-though the sun shown through a light layer of low clouds and the boys with their purple uniforms showed the excitement of a new season. Baseball is such an emblematic way to welcome in the Spring season: Outside games, fans eating popcorn and drinking cola, and tan lines.
Baseball is not only a symbol of spring for me, but it is also near and dear to my heart because it has always been a family past time of our. You could say, in fact that we are the All-American family: with our red, white and blue decorated house, 2.5 kids (really only 2-thank goodness: point 5 would be weird) and a dog. My dad is a huge baseball fan, partial to the '61 Yankees-and I hesitate to say (ducking for the on-coming tomato storm) even a current Yankees fan. We made it a priority to see as many baseball fields as possible in our 13 moves and millions of cross country trips. I believe I even have pictures of me under 1 year old in a white bonnet cheering on some obscure baseball team-it is in my blood. So not only was the on-coming of spring a gift today in the form of a leather bound white ball with red laces... but it was also a reminder of family and all that together really brought me joy.
Amongst the hustle and bustle of a truly busy day; later in the quite reflection of a day not yet lost; I am living in that moment, sitting with 2 dear friends watching spring ushered in thru the strength of the bat against a ball, and the memories of family; appreciating the simplicity of life and happy to live in it.
Go Twins! (and maybe even-Go Yankees!)
Sunday, April 1, 2007
Round Two
So, today I begin Round 2 of 'Surprise Me, God'. Although I feel like everyday should be in some small way, a Surprise Me, God day but this time around, I have a new perspective on the experiment--today Terry Esau, the writer of the book 'Surprise Me, God' spoke at our All-Area Leadership for Young Life... Hearing him speak caused me to want to begin again on the whole thing and see where God will surprise me this time. I think a part of the campaign that I didn't do well last time, was really listening to God... following Him into the surprises, instead of waiting for the surprises to come to me. The experiment is really unique because i think it give me the opportunity to see God in the small things and live out His will as I seek to walk into surprises through encounters with new people and conversations with people I may not usually converse with.
I am anxious to see where the surprises come from and what I will learn. My favorite thing about the experiment is the heightened awareness of what God is doing in everyday life. So, tomorrow I wake up and say, "Surprise Me, God" and sometimes the surprises will be great and other time they will be small and seemingly-insignificant, but still great. As Terry said, it isn't a formula or some supernatural promise that God will do magic for me--it is more a way to look at life, rosy glasses. So, today I put on the rosy glasses and hold on to my seat...
So, tomorrow I will wake up and see where God will surprise me.
Cheers.
I am anxious to see where the surprises come from and what I will learn. My favorite thing about the experiment is the heightened awareness of what God is doing in everyday life. So, tomorrow I wake up and say, "Surprise Me, God" and sometimes the surprises will be great and other time they will be small and seemingly-insignificant, but still great. As Terry said, it isn't a formula or some supernatural promise that God will do magic for me--it is more a way to look at life, rosy glasses. So, today I put on the rosy glasses and hold on to my seat...
So, tomorrow I will wake up and see where God will surprise me.
Cheers.
Monday, December 18, 2006
Christmas is coming! I leave tomorrow for my beach, palm tree Christmas! Whooo Hoooo! I'm so excited to see my family and bask in the comfort it is to be home. One more event tonight, a YoungLife Christmas party. I am hoping that it is a really good time as we enjoy the movie Elf, go Christmas Caroling and eat yummy cookies! Hooray!
Today Jen, a gal in my office had her first baby, a son named Cayden Vincent, she had him at 1:30pm this afternoon and what is phenomenal to me is that at that exact time the rest of the staff were in the Nativity movie watching Mary give birth to her son, Jesus. I am so excited for Jen and Cayden and pumped to meet him! And even more phenomenal was the portral of the Nativity in this movie. I guess I have always heard the story and read the story, but not seen it in such a way that I got lost in it. I came to the realization that Jesus was just a baby... Nothing more. He caused Mary pain in childbirth and cried as he exited the womb. He suckled to his mother and fussed when he was uncomfortable. I guess that is something that I should grasp, but I never did. It was so interested to watch the shepherds and wise men be in awe of this baby that looked no different from any other baby. One of my favorite parts of the movie is when the shepherd leans over to touch baby Jesus, and then hesitates, but Mary says, "He is a gift for ALL people" and the lowly, poor, socially inept shepherd reaches out to touch him. Beautiful. That is us, you know, lowly, poor, socially unable to impress our Savior, and yet, he is here this Christmas and all Christmases for ALL of us.
What would it look like this Christmas to reach out and touch him? To reach to the baby and see his skin, his flesh and know that deep inside he is also deity. I hope I can figure this out in the next 7 days, I hope I can reach out and touch the baby Jesus.
Today Jen, a gal in my office had her first baby, a son named Cayden Vincent, she had him at 1:30pm this afternoon and what is phenomenal to me is that at that exact time the rest of the staff were in the Nativity movie watching Mary give birth to her son, Jesus. I am so excited for Jen and Cayden and pumped to meet him! And even more phenomenal was the portral of the Nativity in this movie. I guess I have always heard the story and read the story, but not seen it in such a way that I got lost in it. I came to the realization that Jesus was just a baby... Nothing more. He caused Mary pain in childbirth and cried as he exited the womb. He suckled to his mother and fussed when he was uncomfortable. I guess that is something that I should grasp, but I never did. It was so interested to watch the shepherds and wise men be in awe of this baby that looked no different from any other baby. One of my favorite parts of the movie is when the shepherd leans over to touch baby Jesus, and then hesitates, but Mary says, "He is a gift for ALL people" and the lowly, poor, socially inept shepherd reaches out to touch him. Beautiful. That is us, you know, lowly, poor, socially unable to impress our Savior, and yet, he is here this Christmas and all Christmases for ALL of us.
What would it look like this Christmas to reach out and touch him? To reach to the baby and see his skin, his flesh and know that deep inside he is also deity. I hope I can figure this out in the next 7 days, I hope I can reach out and touch the baby Jesus.
Wednesday, December 6, 2006
In Humility There is Hope
SURPRISE. An answer, in part, to the request I threw out in the last e-mail for either something big to happen or for me to understand more fully how much the little surprises matter.
Still no BIG surprise. But at Andy's house today, we took 20 minutes to read devotional books and come back to our 5 faithful staff people and share what we learn. I took a devotional that was broken up by scripture passage, and I opened up to a passage from Luke.... Being that it is the holiday season, it was very fitting and I began to read a beautiful passage. I wish I could write out the passage, but I don't have the book, but it talked about how humble Christ's birth was. It talked about the stable, the smell of dung and the sweet breath of the animals. It talked about the virgin who was so full of humility that she was willing to accept her pregnancy as a gift. It talked about going from being the all-powerful, awe-inspiring God of the universe to a baby, a simple, reliant, helpless baby. What humble circumstances.
But the fact that God would choose to do this only means that he is beyond willing to work thru humble circumstances. He is willing to bring hope to even the lowliest of folks. Like me, a sinner, he brings hope to even me. In a world so hopeless, there is HOPE. In a world of few BIG surprises, there are surprises. So, even though I would still love to see a BIG surprise come in my life during this experiment, I also have to focus on the fact that Christ's birth didn't even seem like a BIG thing at the time (it was humble), but yet.... IT WAS.
Still no BIG surprise. But at Andy's house today, we took 20 minutes to read devotional books and come back to our 5 faithful staff people and share what we learn. I took a devotional that was broken up by scripture passage, and I opened up to a passage from Luke.... Being that it is the holiday season, it was very fitting and I began to read a beautiful passage. I wish I could write out the passage, but I don't have the book, but it talked about how humble Christ's birth was. It talked about the stable, the smell of dung and the sweet breath of the animals. It talked about the virgin who was so full of humility that she was willing to accept her pregnancy as a gift. It talked about going from being the all-powerful, awe-inspiring God of the universe to a baby, a simple, reliant, helpless baby. What humble circumstances.
But the fact that God would choose to do this only means that he is beyond willing to work thru humble circumstances. He is willing to bring hope to even the lowliest of folks. Like me, a sinner, he brings hope to even me. In a world so hopeless, there is HOPE. In a world of few BIG surprises, there are surprises. So, even though I would still love to see a BIG surprise come in my life during this experiment, I also have to focus on the fact that Christ's birth didn't even seem like a BIG thing at the time (it was humble), but yet.... IT WAS.
Tuesday, December 5, 2006
Hope and hopelessness
It has been a long time since I have posted anything. I'd like to say I have had tons of surprises and just failed to account for them due to busyness, but that just isn't so. There are obviously surprises in everyday things, but nothing huge has been happening. Let me account for a few of the "everyday" surprises.
First of all, we had some awesome God-filled programs for Young Life. I was really blown away by how awesome WyldLife was on Friday. So many leaders and such great execution, not to mention fun, awesome kids who I think had a great time. This was really an answer to prayer, as I still get anxious before I execute an event.
Next, a really fun YoungLife event... Laser tag with some really awesome students! Also, prayers answered when one of the leaders brought some friends, so we had an ample amount of leaders! Wow-God is awesome, that we can have such a great time and know it is all because he wants us to. It was really our first MA alone YL event and we just had a blast and I was so blown away by how little I should have worried about the execution of it, because it all ended up okay.
So much to be grateful for and so many great God surprises. I have received some beautiful Christmas gifts so far this year and just feel people loving on me in so many different ways and that is such a gift from God. My meal group met tonight and I am so thankful for their friendship and the great conversations we have, filled with grace.
I am not unsatisfied with the perspective of life this experiment has given me. I love seeing the world thru the lens of God surprising us in all the little things in life. But, in the midst of this experiment, I would love to experience one BIG surprise. I don't know what that would look like, and in fact perhaps that is not what I am supposed to experience thru this. Perhaps, I am supposed to learn that life is filled with small blessings, so numerous that they create the BIG surprises. But how fun would it be to have a surprise that outweighs the rest, something truly extraordinary, a story that makes people want to believe in hope and power. I think hope is something that the world is in desperate need of... sometimes it seems almost extinct.
Sometimes I am overwhelmed with hopelessness; and desire so bad to have something to hold on to that insinuates hope. Some friends and I were at the Mall of America this weekend and we were looking thru the many requests on the Giving Tree, for the families that are not able to get Christmas gifts. The gifts ranged from long underwear for an 80 year old man to a hot potato game for an 8 year old. Some asked for necessities like gift cards to grocery stores and others asked for something they wanted like the request for a new watch. It really was overwhelming to look thru the 100s of requests and think that we can only
afford to help one or two people out. Plus, so many people were just walking by, and who knows their story, perhaps they are doing all they can, or have already donated elsewhere. But as my 3 friends and I searched the mall up and down for a beautiful maternity outfit for Shondra, the 21 year old mother-to-be that we have never met, but that I haven't stopped praying for since, I was overcome by the sense that that wasn't enough.
I wonder if Shondra will receive her gift this holiday and count that as the BIG surprise that gives her hope. Or again, perhaps it is in the little God surprises that she will find hope. To see God working thru WyldLife and Young Life and to know that this is not our home, that too could be hope. Maybe a BIG surprise is too much to ask, and that is okay, but I also think about how big God is... What amazing things he is capable of... Perhaps one of those BIG surprises will come my way.
First of all, we had some awesome God-filled programs for Young Life. I was really blown away by how awesome WyldLife was on Friday. So many leaders and such great execution, not to mention fun, awesome kids who I think had a great time. This was really an answer to prayer, as I still get anxious before I execute an event.
Next, a really fun YoungLife event... Laser tag with some really awesome students! Also, prayers answered when one of the leaders brought some friends, so we had an ample amount of leaders! Wow-God is awesome, that we can have such a great time and know it is all because he wants us to. It was really our first MA alone YL event and we just had a blast and I was so blown away by how little I should have worried about the execution of it, because it all ended up okay.
So much to be grateful for and so many great God surprises. I have received some beautiful Christmas gifts so far this year and just feel people loving on me in so many different ways and that is such a gift from God. My meal group met tonight and I am so thankful for their friendship and the great conversations we have, filled with grace.
I am not unsatisfied with the perspective of life this experiment has given me. I love seeing the world thru the lens of God surprising us in all the little things in life. But, in the midst of this experiment, I would love to experience one BIG surprise. I don't know what that would look like, and in fact perhaps that is not what I am supposed to experience thru this. Perhaps, I am supposed to learn that life is filled with small blessings, so numerous that they create the BIG surprises. But how fun would it be to have a surprise that outweighs the rest, something truly extraordinary, a story that makes people want to believe in hope and power. I think hope is something that the world is in desperate need of... sometimes it seems almost extinct.
Sometimes I am overwhelmed with hopelessness; and desire so bad to have something to hold on to that insinuates hope. Some friends and I were at the Mall of America this weekend and we were looking thru the many requests on the Giving Tree, for the families that are not able to get Christmas gifts. The gifts ranged from long underwear for an 80 year old man to a hot potato game for an 8 year old. Some asked for necessities like gift cards to grocery stores and others asked for something they wanted like the request for a new watch. It really was overwhelming to look thru the 100s of requests and think that we can only
afford to help one or two people out. Plus, so many people were just walking by, and who knows their story, perhaps they are doing all they can, or have already donated elsewhere. But as my 3 friends and I searched the mall up and down for a beautiful maternity outfit for Shondra, the 21 year old mother-to-be that we have never met, but that I haven't stopped praying for since, I was overcome by the sense that that wasn't enough.
I wonder if Shondra will receive her gift this holiday and count that as the BIG surprise that gives her hope. Or again, perhaps it is in the little God surprises that she will find hope. To see God working thru WyldLife and Young Life and to know that this is not our home, that too could be hope. Maybe a BIG surprise is too much to ask, and that is okay, but I also think about how big God is... What amazing things he is capable of... Perhaps one of those BIG surprises will come my way.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
